Trust

Whom do you trust most in the world?

For me, that's easy: I trust my wife. I would have no problems giving her access to all the money I've made, complete access to my secrets, or putting my life in her hands. I've done the first two and I effectively do the third every time I sleep next to her or ask her to drive.

It's odd that trusting God is a more difficult thing for me to do. He has more power to work good in my life than Leah does. He's proven Himself good by giving me her, saving me from my destructive thought patterns, giving me money while I pursue a writing career, blessing us at every turn, and protecting us from more than we know. By those same blessings, He's proven that He cares about me personally and wants the best for me.

Why then do I still have such a hard time having faith? Our money has been blessed. We actually have more in savings now than when we got married. Some of that is people giving us wedding money, some is from her old employer needing for part-time work for a few months, and some is from totally unexpected sources, like the IRS. God has been providing, but the human side of me is wondering how long the blessings will hold up and what I'm going to do to provide for my wife and I.

This is not an inspirational post. It's kind of just a get-it-out-there post because I need to get out of my own way and trust in God. He's been providing for us so far. There's no reason to believe He'll stop so long as we're in His will.